Lollipop Splash – The Remix – $35- $65

Via People:

Mariah Carey found sweet success with her last fragrance, Lollipop Bling, which was inspired by hubby Nick Cannon’s delicious wedding proposal. And now, the new mama is sating her sweet tooth again with another addition to her Elizabeth Arden fragrance franchise. Called Lollipop Splash the Remix, the trio of new scents shows off Carey’s fun-loving personality and features hand-picked ingredients that express the singer’s playful side.

I really just cannot get on-board with Mariah‘s childish ways  (“eternally 12 years old” — her words) with this campaign.  She’s a 41 year old wife and mother of twins.  The promo photograph is so gratingly annoying, what with the little clips in her hair, the Lolita-ish pose with a sucker on her lips.  The garishness of the colors and gummy-like butterflies make me cringe.

Who’s up for some Gummy Butterflies?

I’m feeling a bit carsick at the very idea of the gaggy-sweetness of Lollipop Splash:  The Remix.  I think it should be sold in the candy aisle at Walgreen’s, but I understand this trio of simple syrup and food coloring will be sold in major departments stores  (Macy’s) starting in July.

Seriously.  I just can’t.

I’ll take an elegant 10-ct. Neil Lane cushion cut diamond ring any day over this mall-kiosk designed Jason, of Beverly Hills-designed necklace that Nick Cannon gave his wife and mother of twins, Mariah Carey.  I’m not feelin’ it.

via People.com:

“Nick was really excited about the babies’ names and wanted to do a piece with them for Mariah’s first Mother’s Day,”“Pink sapphires are bright and bold and diamonds are always so classic.” The sparkling piece, which also incorporates 14-karat white and rose gold, is valued at $12,000. jeweler Jason Arasheben explains.

Cannon, a longtime customer of Jason, was excited about his big surprise. “Nick came in and met with Jason on the Friday after his twins were born,” a source tells PEOPLE. “He was bleary eyed, looking so tired but so happy — all smiles, saying he wanted to design something special for Mariah’s first Mother’s day. He couldn’t wait to surprise her on Sunday.”

I guess the polite thing for me to say would be, “My goodness! That sure is SPARKLY!”, right?

Mariah Carey has entire squad at her disposal to take care of every hair on her head, every eyelash and each individual fingernail. She is lucky to have minions to take care of her every need, want and desire. Mariah doesn’t brush her hair! She has people that do it for her.

Too bad she didn’t have someone to tell her to put the champagne glass down. After winning praise for her role in Precious, the singer had too much to drink and gave a tipsy speech at the 2010 Palm Springs International Film Awards.

Carey wobbled to the stage and had trouble forming complete sentences. She was there to accept her award as Breakthrough Artist, but failed to stay sober long enough to graciously accept it. This is a miss in my book. We all have our moments that sneak up on us, but at an awards ceremony…keep it classy.

So we don’t have a million people to help us look good – although we all live in hope that that will happen one day – but you can still get Mariah’s look at home.

To get that flawless complexion, try Avon’s Soft Matte Mousse Makeup. I know, Avon probably reminds you of your mum, but Avon products are going through a revolution and I’m loving their new formulations.

For the cheeks and eyes (you know we love products that can do both), give MAC’s Beauty Powder Blush in True Romantic a go. It’s subtle but very very sexy.

To further give your eyes a pop, apply Shu Uemura’s False Eyelashes. These lashes are, seriously, the best money can buy and totally worth the expense.

Finish the look with a frosty lip gloss. We love Revlon’s Lipgloss in Glossy Rose.